It was a regular day at work. Sitting in solace, I realised how much I wait for this time, for my days are hectic. Sadly, the moment didn’t last long. My phone rang, it was my husband calling to pick me up. As I got into the car, he had already started whining about his tedious day. Not that I don’t want to listen to him, but for once it would feel nice if we ever talked about how my day went too. I tried telling him how exhausting my day went but he cut me off in between saying he would like to eat something special tonight for dinner. Well, now I had to figure out what to cook instead of destressing myself. Never mind, I guess, I was just overthinking about it.
Finally we got home and I was about to shut my eyes for a while but I heard “Aisha! I would like to have a cup of tea to loosen up a bit.” I sighed in my head but nevertheless went straight to the kitchen.
“Aisha, why has our daughter got such low grades in Science, are you not paying enough attention on her studies?” At that moment I wanted to throw that cup of tea and ask was it only my responsibility to look after everything? I guess, I was just overthinking, so chose to stay silent.
While cooking the dinner, I couldn’t help but think about the article I read the other day about how not being able to say what you feel is a sign of a toxic relationship which harms your mental health. Of course, there came “Aisha, what is taking so long? You know I’m starving.” At that moment I wanted to scream, yell and ask him that loving each other just meant that I had to take care of all the bodies rather than just mine? I am the one to be blamed undoubtedly if things aren’t the way you want. What about me? What about us?
Well, I guess, I was just overthinking again because the things I think the most about, are the ones I speak the least about.